The Best and Worst Time of My Life: The Lived Experience and Meaning of Pregnancy in Women with Mild to Moderate Depression

The notion that pregnancy can, for some women, be a time of unhappiness
and depression has only recently been recognized in media and by the general public.
Although researchers and clinicians have begun to study antenatal depression with
regards to prevalence, associated factors, and treatment approaches and outcomes, less
is known about women’s lived experience of this phenomenon. A hermeneutic
phenomenological study was conducted with six pregnant women who scored 10, 11, or
12 on the Edinburgh Postnatal Depression Scale, indicating mild to moderate
symptoms of depression. Participants were interviewed individually regarding their
experiences of depression during pregnancy. Data generated in the form of transcripts
were analyzed and five themes emerged: disconnection vs. new connection and/or
reconnection; loss of identity vs. new identity; fatigue and illness vs. vitality and
wellness; anxiety and insecurity vs. confidence and security; and sadness and
hopelessness vs. joy and expectation. The overarching shared meaning of these
experiences was ambivalence. Findings provided rich, thick descriptions of the lived
experience and meaning of antenatal depression. Future research and implications for
counseling practice are discussed.
KEY WORDS: Pregnancy, antenatal depression, qualitative, ambivalence, lived
experience, lived meaningand depression has only recently been recognized in media and by the general public.
Although researchers and clinicians have begun to study antenatal depression with
regards to prevalence, associated factors, and treatment approaches and outcomes, less
is known about women’s lived experience of this phenomenon. A hermeneutic
phenomenological study was conducted with six pregnant women who scored 10, 11, or
12 on the Edinburgh Postnatal Depression Scale, indicating mild to moderate
symptoms of depression. Participants were interviewed individually regarding their
experiences of depression during pregnancy. Data generated in the form of transcripts
were analyzed and five themes emerged: disconnection vs. new connection and/or
reconnection; loss of identity vs. new identity; fatigue and illness vs. vitality and
wellness; anxiety and insecurity vs. confidence and security; and sadness and
hopelessness vs. joy and expectation. The overarching shared meaning of these
experiences was ambivalence. Findings provided rich, thick descriptions of the lived
experience and meaning of antenatal depression. Future research and implications for
counseling practice are discussed.
KEY WORDS: Pregnancy, antenatal depression, qualitative, ambivalence, lived
experience, lived meaning.